I have no idea why but The Taiwan Weekly has been released early. Here is the main article for this week's edition.
大安區 (Daan Area) Foreign Resident In Tone Uproar
Wednesday 0ctober 28th, 2009
In an unprecedented incident, Daan foreign resident, Mika Bertram, humiliated himself and scores of other people by using the wrong tone while ordering his lunch. The incident happened today at around 1:32pm after Mika approached a typical local noodle stand and made his request. Unfortunately while specifying his dietary requirements, he came unstuck and left the queue of customers and the staff all red-faced and unsure of where to look.
"I just wanted to let the man know that I'm a vegetarian. I had no intention of offending everyone. I usually get my tones perfect. I just can't believe that no one put two and two together and helped me. The woman behind me even pinched her nose in disgust as if I suddenly smelled too," a visibly shaken Mr Bertram told our reporter.
"He just went for it. I had no idea he was just going to dive in there and say it, otherwise I could have helped him. I don't know what he's going to do from here, he lives in the area, man he won't bounce back from this. I mean, he just walked straight up to the counter, with his head held high, shoulders back and said, 'I want to eat poo,' reported eyewitness Huang Lin-Chen, his friend and classmate at the local university.
It took a lot of convincing to get the noodle shop owner Wang Chien-An to speak to us, but eventually he agreed to make a comment. "It's bad for business, bad for the community, and most importantly bad for international relations. Who says they want to eat poo in this day and age? I don't believe the young man for a second when he says he got his tones confused. The tones are the easiest part of the language!"
According to Mr. Bertram, the most perplexing part of the incident was the fact that no one came to his defense and no one could work out that he was trying to say he was a vegetarian rather than he had a desire to eat faeces.
"Everyone sort of clutched their stomaches and looked at me with these pained expressions on their faces. I've never been so embarrassed in all of my life. I went straight to my apartment and booked a ticket back home. I'm hoping I can transfer my credit points from the university and everything."
Asked if he'd learned anything from the incident, Mr. Bertram replied, "No, I'm still not sure what the correct tone is."
By: Lipsty
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